Dear diary
Filed under Writing Journal on November 5, 2004
Tagged: Maiden of Pain
I’ve had a lot on my mind recently, and while much of it has to do with writing in general, it has been very difficult to focus specifically on Maiden and the revisions I need to complete. I considered posting about it a couple times already, but held off for various reasons. I’m writing about it now in the hopes that the act of putting these thoughts down in some sort of fixed form will be the cathartic purge I need to get back on track.
I’m being bombarded by signs. I don’t normally go for the whole “signs and portents” thing, but there have definitely been some recent events that have made it hard to ignore a particular train of thought I’ve entertained. It all started with the latest open call from Wizards. Here was an opportunity to get my own novels published, but there was an insane timeline of three months to have a completed manuscript.
If only I wasn’t working 40 hours a week.
Last week, I was randomly surfing through the web and decided to check out the site of a comic that had been discontinued because the creator had another comic that was being picked up by a syndicate and didn’t have enough time or energy to focus on two comics and his full-time job. On the website was an announcement that the comic was returning. It seems that the creator decided to quit his job and make a go of being a professional comic artist.
My job is not very fulfilling. To be honest, ever since winning the Maiden of Pain open call, I can’t visualize myself doing anything but writing, so I’m not sure I’d feel different anywhere I worked. My wife knows this, knows the ultimate goal is for me to write full time, and is supportive of this. So, when Wizards announced the open call for their new novel line, I brought up the subject of me quitting and spending the next three months finishing the first Chronicles of Arunda novel.
She has concerns, which I totally understand. We would have to sell the house. We could live off the proceeds, but that would set us back when it came time to buy a new home. There is no guarantee I would win, and no idea how much money would be awarded. Having another source of income to supplement the equity we’d get out of the sale would go a long way towards bolstering her fears, but we don’t want her going back to work and I feel like even taking part-time work defeats the purpose of quitting in the first place.
Then there’s the issue of insurance. My wife and I could probably survive without it, but we have our son to worry about. In the end, my responsibility to my family is the deciding factor it all comes down to.
I haven’t made up my mind entirely yet. There are things that need to be wrapped up first. There are the revisions for Maiden of Pain, we have to finish painting the outside of house before we can sell it, and there is a marcomm position available at my company that I’m applying for. If I don’t get the job, and we can sell the house before the end of the year, that may be the last sign I’m looking for.
I know that my own novels will see print one day, but I admit I’ve always been something of an “instant gratification” kind of guy. The idea of being a full-time writer sooner, rather than later, is a lure that is very hard to resist.
